Perfection

All my life i strive to be perfect, to be proud and accountable for my actions, my ability, even superficial things like my looks. But of course that never happens.

I thought that having choices would make me live life easier. I resented rich people who had choices spread out in front of them, without the need for the extra miles. Or any other kind of privileged people for that matter. Perfection would be having able to do what i want. But now that i have choices, i realize its not so easy making the decision after all.

And that's because all the choices have pros and cons. And so it all boils down to perfection again really. Nothing in life is perfect, so none of the choices is perfect, and therefore no decision made on those choices could be perfect either. Basically the world is just full of imperfections operating within their limitations.

Well, i know that's a very uninteresting point to make, but it's exactly what i feel right now.

In a perfect world, I would be able to become an accomplished doctor by the age of 30, maybe even a specialist. By then I would have already started a family and lived comfortably in a house that I owned. But this is not a perfect world, and I would be lucky to reach there when I'm 35. I would be even luckier to remain in this close-to-perfect relationship by that time.

But I guess if I have to live my life all over again, there's very little I'm gonna change about it. And living life without much regrets may be part of perfection.